The Misadventures of Jin Kazama
by NinjaBoyTellEm
Summary: Jin has the one thing he always wanted, a family. However, under Hwoarang's wing, the two cause chaos and havoc amongst everyone else and get in a lot of trouble while they do it. Chapter 4 FINALLY up.
1. Run, Kazama, Run

_Disclaimer: I do not own Tekken, so read already._

_Chapter 1: Sneaking out_

Miami Florida. 2:00 a.m. Jin Kazama and his buddy Hwoarang are in a neighborhood hanging out. They both had snuck out their houses as well. They were busy throwing rocks at cars.

"Kazama," Hwoarang said "the next car that comes by here, I'm gonna hit them with this."

He hold up a small cup full of mashed potatoes, green beans, corn, and spinach. A car comes by the street at an average speed (about 25 mph), and Hwoarang prepares to nail the car with the cup.

"Here it comes," Hwoarang said.

"I don't think we should do that," Jin said "I swear there were three guys in the car going to the club."

Hwoarang does not listen and throws the cup at the car. Boom! It had hit the back window of the car. The car had hit the brakes hard! The smoke could be seen from the tires. A black guy, dressed in a hoodie and blue jeans, got out the car and said

"I'm gonna kill you little muthafuckas!"

"Shit, run for it!" Hwoarang said as he took off at a blazing speed. Jin followed suit.

The two kept running down the street as the car sped up to them. The passengers shot their guns at the two. The two passengers, who wore skimasks, baggy clothing, and chains on their necks, failed to hit Jin and Hwoarang. The two runners started to take a left onto 5th Avenue which is about 7 blocks from Jin's home.

"Kazama!" Hwoarang said "Do not enter any alleys or we'll be spotted easily."

Jin did anyway before Hwoarang started to talk.

"Dumbass," Hwoarang said as he ran across a crosswalk. He then headed to his house, which was about a block or two ahead.

Hwoarang realized the Baek would kill him for sneaking out in the first place. Hwoarang instead headed for Jin's house.

_Meanwhile_

Jin was still running down the alley he entered. _How long is this fucking alley? _He thought. It seems as though he outran the car chasing him until it came up from behind him.

"Hey, you," Another figure from the car emerged. This man seemed to be shorter that that other guy and a lot fatter to boot.

"Were you one of the motherfuckers that threw that shit at that car?" He continued.

"No," Jin tried to lie.

"I know your ass is lying," the figure said approaching Jin. Jin then proceeded to knock the guy to the ground with an Electric Wind Hook Fist. Jin then ran down the rest of the alley.

"What the hell are you doing? Get up and shoot him." A feminine figure had exited the car. The only thing that one would notice is that she had brown hair. The two ran down the alley after Jin.

While Jin ran he saw a fence in his way. "Damn," Jin then proceeded to climb the fence. The two other figures were climbing after him too.

"Oh **S**ugar **H**oney **I**ced **T**ea," Jin shouted as he got to the other side of the fence.

_**Hey, moron, try hiding behind someone's house. **_Jin's conscious said to him.

Jin followed his advice and scoped out to find a big enough building to hide behind. He saw an abandoned building that seemed to be an apartment complex once upon a time. He headed that way since that was not far from his home. While hiding, he saw his pursuers speed by. This was his chance to escape. He transformed to Devil Jin and took flight.

"What the fuck, I could've flown the whole time?!"

_**No shit asshole, you're just too slow to actually think of that.**_

"Go fuck yourself," Jin said to his mind.

_Two minutes later_

Jin had finally reached his home. 2259 Tallahassee Avenue. He tucked his wings into his skin, and his tattoos and horns disappeared. He took his house key out and opened the door. As he entered, he collapsed to the floor.

"Glad that's over...I am so..."

"BUSTED!!" The lights came on and two figures that belonged to Jun Kazama and Kazuya Mishima were in the foyer waiting, arms crossed.

"Oh, shit...I'm boned" Jin said as he got up.

**I had to put this up as a replacement to another Tekken story I deleted. Read and review.**


	2. Oh, shoot, I'm grounded

_Disclaimer: No ownership of Tekken_

Breakdown: **Bold** represents native tounge language. _Italics _are thoughts.

_Chapter 2: Grounded_

Jin had gotten up from the floor and looked at his parents, who glared at him in an evil way. If looks could kill, he'd be dead. Jin started to laugh nervously.

"Mother, Father, what are you two still doing up?" Jin asked.

"The question is, what are _you_ doing up, and out of the house for that matter?" Jun asked Jin. Jin just stood there looking stupid and innocent.

"Answer your mother dammit!" Kazuya yelled.

"Okay, okay," Jin said "This is what happened…" Just then, someone started beating on the door violently. Jin shook nervously.

"Kazama! Kazama! Open the door, it me Hwoarang" Hwoarang said.

"No way man," Jin said, slightly suspicious. "How do I know you're Hwoarang?"

"You have a picture of your mother in your wallet," Hwoarang said. Jin proceeded to open the door. Hwoarang fell to the floor when the door opened.

"You were saying," Kazuya interrupted.

"This is what happened, me and Hwoarang…" Jin started to say but was yet again interrupted by a knock at the door.

"Who the fuck is at my door?!" Kazuya said while cocking a revolver.

"Open the door," a voice said. Kazuya looks in the peep hole and opened the door.

"_Oh shit," Jin thought. "I am so fucked."_

The figure entered the house. He had the same hoodie and jeans Jin recognized. The figure happened to be Bruce Irvin.

"Sup, dawg," Bruce said.

"What's up, Bruce?" Kazuya said.

"It seems your son threw rocks and food at my car" Bruce said.

"WHAT?!" Kazuya started to turn beet red at this. Jin started to sweat in fear as Kazuya approached Jin, who was dead set on killing Jin.

"Relax, Kazuya, I have the car paid for," Bruce said. "I'm just gonna go and act like this night did not happen." He then left the house. Jun then looked at her son.

"I have one word for you Jin, grounded," Jun said. "and you can forget about the Slipknot concert this weekend."

"Come on!" Jin yelled. "This is the only time they'll come to the southeast until four years pass."

"Well, sucks for you," Kazuya said to Jin. He saw Hwoarang trying to inch out of the door. He grabbed Hwoarang by his shirt and dragged back into the house.

"Where are you going? Call Baek," Kazuya demanded. Hwoarang's face showed sheer fear at what Baek might do to him.

"_God help me because I don't know if I'll make it" Hwoarang thought._

Before he dialed the number, Baek came through the door, seething.

"**Hwoarang, what the hell were you doing throwing rocks at cars?!" **Baek asked.

"**Master, I…" **Hwoarang started to say.

"**No need to explain, you're grounded, which means one week with me, 70 miles running, ten a day. I'm gonna run you dead," **Baek said. Hwoarang started to cry. Baek proceeded to drag Hwoarang out of the house by his ear.

"**Now, what?" **Jin asked.

"**I picked the last punishment, Kazuya, your turn" **Jun smirked.

Kazuya started to snicker evilly.

"**Boy, for the next week, you will become my servant," **Kazuya began, then sneered. **"I expect you to wait on me hand and foot and serve to my every whim, got it?"**

Jin did not respond. He went to his room, shut the door, and cried himself to sleep.

"This is going to be fun," Kazuya snickered.

_The next day, at Hwoarang's house_

Hwoarang was busy running laps on the track Baek installed. He had ran 10 laps, equivalent to five miles. He was getting tired and dehydrated. Baek was clearly enjoying it as was his crowd of 10,000 people.

"Ten more laps Hwoarang, and you can have a Gatorade," Baek said, drinking one.

"Oh, god, I'm gonna pass out," Hwoarang said, exhausted. He now had 6 laps left.

"Be constant, my pupil," Baek said with a megaphone. "Ladies and gentlemen, Hwoarang has two laps to go, will he make it?"

Hwoarang started to sprint hard. This was his last lap. The crowd jumped to their feet.

"This is it I'm almost done," Hwoarang said. Baek started to wave a checkered flag as Hwoarang crossed the finish line. Baek and the crowd clapped in approval.

"Well done, my pupil," Baek said "Tomorrow, you will hopefully improve from the mediocre display.

"_One of these days, old man," Hwoarang thought. "One of these days."_

_At Jin's house_

Jin was busy getting popcorn, soda, and chips for his father and his buddies while they watched the NFL Preseason. Kazuya was watching his favorite team, the Vikings, face the New England Patriots and killing the Patriots.

"Boy, where's my cream soda?" Kazuya yelled to Jin who was in the kitchen.

"Coming," Jin said. "Mom, can you help me?"

"Sorry, son," Jun said. "I can't keep bailing you out every time you screw up."

Jin proceeded to deliver the cream soda to Kazuya.

"Why aren't you in uniform?" Kazuya asked his son. Jin left to his room and changed clothes. He came back out in a Minnesota Vikings cheerleading outfit, pompoms included. Lei, Bryan, Marshall Law, and Bruce, started to laugh their asses off.

"What a pansy," Bryan said, laughing harder.

"Jin Kazama, I'm placing you under arrest for being a fruitcake," Lei said tearing up.

"Just take your damn snacks assholes," Jin said, feeling emasculated.

"May I leave, your majesty?" Jin asked to Kazuya.

"Yes, you may," Kazuya said glued to the game.

Jin left to his room and called Xiaoyu, telling her how much his life sucks now and how he wished he were dead.

**Damn, those** **guys have it rough, don't they? Shout out to TJSC25 for making this story one of his favs. Enjoy a preview of Chapter 3: Freshman Beat Up Day:**

_Jin, Hwoarang, and some of their fellow seniors walked around the cafeteria. They were looming around the freshmen, who were obviously scared. Hwoarang walked past the table._

"_Freshman beat up day!!" he yelled. He proceeded to kick a student towards the wall. Then the rest of the seniors joined in on pummeling the other freshmen. Soon, chaos consumed the cafeteria. The juniors and sophomores stood by laughing at it all._

_Jin and Hwoarang were laughing their asses off as freshmen trampled each other trying to get up the stairs and out the doors._

"_Kazama, we are so dead" Hwoarang said_

"_It was worth it," Jin replied._

"_Stop standing around and help us with the freshmen," Asuka said._

"_Yeah," Ling Xiaoyu agreed as her and Asuka double teamed a girl freshman._


	3. Freshman Beat Up Day

Disclaimer: I do not own Tekken.

_Last time on The Misadventures of Jin Kazama…_

_Baek: Come on Hwoarang, only 6 nore laps_

_Hwaorang (panting): Must…kill…old man._

_(at the Kazama residence)_

_Kazuya: Ready? Begin!!!_

_Jin (in the cheerleading outfit): 2, 4, 6, 8, Who do we appreciate? Vikings, Vikings, Go Vikings._

_Kazuya: HA!_

_(Jin goes to his room, sobbing)_

_Chapter 3: Freshman Beat up Day_

(6 months later)

At Mishima State University, Jin and Hwoarang sat amongst their fellow seniors plotting some new scheme that will used against the freshmen.

"Everybody know the plan?" Jin asked.

"Yeah!" the seniors responded in unison.

"So it's settled" Hwoarang said. "There will be a freshmen beat up day on the 12th of February."

"You know some of them know this right?" Jin asked, knowing some of the freshmen knew of their plans. "They all heard you over the intercom."

"I'm bluffing." Hwoarang responded slyly. "We'll get them, they won't know when."

"Now you're getting it." Jin said, doing the Soulja Boy dance, Crank Dat.

Fortunately for them, this got the freshmen's attention and frightened them. This is what those two wanted, to catch their fresh meat off-guard.

(Jin and Hwoarang in Math 191)

"H, are Asuka and Xiao still helping us?" Jin asked

"Aren't they freshmen?" Hwoarang asked.

"One of them is my friend, and I'm related to the other." Jin responded. "I told everyone else that they were helping us."

"All right Kazama, but it'll cost you." Hwoarang said, clearly not happy with it.

"Name your price." Jin managed to get out, knowing that his wallet was going to suffer.

"A thousand." Hwoarang smirked.

Jin reached into his wallet and pulled out ten one-hundred dollar bills. He painfully handed them over to Hwoarang.

"Thanks, dipshit." Hwoarang laughed while counting his newfound fortune.

"You're welcome, hoe." Jin responded.

(At the cafeteria, lunchtime)

Jin and Hwoarang were eating their lunch with Asuka and Ling Xiaoyu rather quickly, because they were about to make their move on the freshmen.

"Ya'll ready?" Jin asked.

"Hell yeah," Hwoarang said.

"Let's do this," Xiaoyu and Asuka said. The four got up and started to recruit the other seniors that were in on the plan.

Jin, Hwoarang, and some of their fellow seniors walked around the cafeteria. They were looming around the freshmen, who were obviously scared. Hwoarang walked past the table.

"Freshman beat up day!!" he yelled. He proceeded to kick a student towards the wall. Then the rest of the seniors joined in on pummeling the other freshmen. Soon, chaos consumed the cafeteria. The juniors and sophomores stood by laughing at it all. Bodies flew in every direction. The freshmen cried and started heading for any escape routes possible. Jin and Hwoarang were laughing their asses off as freshmen trampled each other trying to get up the stairs and out the doors.

"Kazama, we are so dead" Hwoarang said

"It was worth it," Jin replied.

"Stop standing around and help us with the freshmen," Asuka said.

"Yeah," Ling Xiaoyu agreed as her and Asuka double teamed one of the freshman girls. Jin and Hwoarang started pounding the shit out of any freshmen coming their way. The freshmen tried to run and cry for mercy, but those two weren't having any of it.

About twenty minutes later, the beatings ceased, and Jin and Hwoarang looked over the carnage they caused. Asuka and Xiaoyu went after any freshmen trying to escape the school. Jin and Hwoarang decided to enjoy some burritos that Kazuya had made for Jin.

"Damn Kazama, these are good," Hwoarang said, adding hot sauce to the steak, cheese, and jalapeños on the inside.

"Be careful, H," Jin warned. "Adding that will mess your bowels up. I did that once and killed every animal with 500 feet of my house. It was like a nuclear explosion."

"Thanks for the heads up," Hwoarang replied. "Go to hell."

"Don't say I didn't warn you," Jin said.

The intercom came on, and Heihachi Mishima's booming and angry voice came on the intercom.

"Jin Kazama and Hwoarang Doo San, report to my office IMMEDIATELY!!!" Heihachi shouted."

"We're fucked, dude," Hwoarang said, about to piss his pants.

**Finally, an update. Sorry it's short. Enjoy a preview for Chapter 4: Lockdown. Shoutout to Getemono for being a W.O.G.**

"_Mr. Chaolan, I have to go to the bathroom," Hwoarang squirmed in his seat, feeling the effects of the burritos from before._

"_We're on lockdown, tough shit," Lee responded._

_Hwoarang got up and went to the door and shouted,_

"_COME ON, MR. CHAOLAN. I GOTTA SHIT!!!"_

_Jin fell out of his seat laughing hard as humanly possible. Lee was fuming and proceeded to go to the door. Hwoarang ran out to find the nearest bathroom._


	4. Lockdown and Mishima's Bakery

**Disclaimer: Don't own Tekken.**

**Warning: Randomness, drug use, and wrestling references ahead. **

_Previously on The Misadventures of Jin Kazama…_

_"Damn Kazama, these are good," Hwoarang said, adding hot sauce to the steak, cheese, and jalapeños on the inside._

_"Be careful, H," Jin warned. "Adding that will mess your bowels up. I did that once and killed every animal with 500 feet of my house. It was like a nuclear explosion."_

_"Thanks for the heads up," Hwoarang replied. "Go to hell."_

_"Don't say I didn't warn you," Jin said._

_The intercom came on, and Heihachi Mishima's booming and angry voice came on the intercom._

_"Jin Kazama and Hwoarang Doo San, report to my office IMMEDIATELY!" Heihachi shouted."_

_"We're fucked, dude," Hwoarang said, about to piss his pants._

_Chapter 4: Lockdown and Mishima's Bakery_

In the aftermath of the Freshman Beatup Day, Mishima University went on lockdown for the remainder of the day.

Meanwhile in Physics class, our two heroes Jin and Hwoarang were in the back sleeping, bored. Out of nowhere, Hwoarang's stomach starts acting up.

"Dammit Kazama," Hwoarang said clutching his stomach. "That's the last time I eat your burritos."

"Yo damn fault," Jin said.

"Damn, I gotta shit," Hwoarang said getting up.

"Good luck," Jin said laughing quietly.

"Mr. Chaolan, I have to go to the bathroom," Hwoarang squirmed in his seat, feeling the effects of the burritos from before.

"We're on lockdown, tough shit," Lee responded.

Hwoarang got up and went to the door and shouted,

"COME ON, MR. CHAOLAN. I GOTTA SHIT!"

Jin fell out of his seat laughing hard as humanly possible. Lee was fuming and proceeded to go to the door. Hwoarang ran out to find the nearest bathroom. The alarm sounds and a scream can be heard from outside. Hwoarang was shocked by 20,000 volts of electricity, which caused him to empty his bowels all over the floor. The students look out and cover their noses.

"Oh man, you jackass," Jin said recording Hwoarang with his iPhone. "This is so going on YouTube and Facebook."

_Later in Heihachi's office…_

"Do you two just live to ruin my day?" Heihachi asks.

"Uh…yeah," Jin said laughing.

"You insolent fucker, I'll kill you," Heihachi shouts.

"Remember your condition, gramps," Jin said pointing to Heihachi's pills for his high blood pressure.

"Damn you, boy," Heihachi said.

"Why are we here?" Hwoarang asked, wearing a diaper.

"You two have fucked me over for the last time," Heihachi said. "As punishment, you two will work in my bakery for the day. Obviously I can't have you two terrorists on my campus. Ain't this a bitch?"

"Whatever," Hwoarang said adjusting his diaper.

"Here's your rattle and pacifier," Jin said handing Hwoarang those.

"Fuck you Kazama," Hwoarang shouts.

"YouTube," Jin shouts. Hwoarang knocks the camera out of Jin's hand which hits Heihachi in the eye.

"MY EYE! DAMMIT!" Heihachi falls down to the ground. When he rises, he has a massive shiner. Jin and Hwoarang flinch from it.

"So…when do I get my clothes back?" Hwoarang asks.

"GET OUT BEFORE I RIP YOUR HEADS OFF AND BOWL WITH THEM!" Heihachi screams. The two book it and head for the bakery.

_Sometime later…_

Beside a busy loud city, there was a quiet little town with a small population. In one part of this town there was a line of popular little shops that many people loved to go to. Among these shops were: Anna Williams' Silicone, King's Wrestling Academy, Mokujin's Hardware, Ogre's Adult Video, who was also the star of 1 Night with Ogre, Chaolan's Clothing, Marduk's waxing and barbershop, and Dr. B's Dentist.

However, one exceptionally popular shop was Mishima's Bakery. It had all kinds of foods and goods from bagels to bread and cakes to pastries.

One day, Nina Williams, who obviously didn't live in town, came into the shop looking around at all the food. Jin Kazama was looking at her from behind the counter and she seemed, to him, to be lost.

"Can…I help you?" he asked raising his eyebrow, the People's Eyebrow, made famous by former wrestler "The Rock."

Nina turned around. "Whatever."

"Now, what would you be looking for, little lady?" he asked.

"You tell me. And don't call me little lady again." Nina responded

"What's the occasion?"

"None of your damn business," she replied coldly.

"Really?" he asked smoothly giving her a knowing smile and a wink, "Well, might I suggest something? Do you…like pie?"

She scrunched up her face and made a gagging sound.

Jin got offended, seeing as how pie was his favorite, especially a certain poontang. "Well, then, do you…. like strudel?" he asked pointing his hand towards her.

"Yah, strudel's good." Nina said, still with her indifferent look on her face.

Jin smiled smugly. "Do you…..like The Kazama strudel?" he asked lifting his shirt a bit and strutting.

"It better be good or I'll kill you," she said.

"Oh," Jin chuckled and smiled seductively, "I garan-damn-tee you that it's the best."

"Ok, then, I'll take some strudel," she said.

She turned around and looked at the other desserts. When she turned back, Jin was leaning against the counter with his pants undone. He had on underwear that said, 'Open here and take a bite out of the sweet goodness. Poontang flavored.'"

"WHAT ARE YOU DOING!" she angrily shrieked, pulling out a gun.

"You wanted strudel. Jin Kazama is giving you strudel."

"I thought you meant strudel. Actual strudel. The dessert that you eat. That's what I wanted. How dare you, you son of a-" she shrieked louder, cocking her gun.

"Whoa, whoa, whoa, WHOA," Jin said cutting her whining and shrieking, making a fist, "Let me get this straight. You want strudel, not the Kazama strudel?" He looked incredulous. "What does this look like, a damn bakery?"

"YES!" she shrieked again.

"Ugh! Shit!" Jin covered his ears, "You sound like a goddamn…. you know, those things that twirl and mush things. Now, help Jin Kazama out."

Slowly she said, "A blend-"

"IT DOESN'T MATTER what you sound like," Jin cut in. "Just don't ever do that again. It hurts Jin. Jin has very sensitive ears, you know. The World's Strongest has already heard enough of Steve's whining: "Mum hug me, Mum love me." "Mum, I hate you, you weren't there for me." Whah, whah, whah. Why don't I just hit the tastiest move, the Demon Slayer Sherbert, on Anna, and take Lee, stand him upright, shine him up real nice with some cooking oil, and stick him straight up Steve's candy coated English ass. Much, of course, to the enjoyments of the millions…"

He breathed the air around him. Hwoarang plays a recording that shouts:

"AND MILLIONS,"

"AND MILLIONS of Jin's cookies. If you listen closely, you can even hear the machines chanting Jin Kazama's name."

Jin looks up. You can hear a combination of the operating machines that actually sounded like: KAAZ-zama, KAAZ-zama, KAAZ-zama

Jin looked back at Nina.

Nina was confused as hell and totally weirded out. She went to the door calling out "Idiot" on the way.

Jin glared at her. "Wait," he demanded.

She turned back.

Jin had his arm held out, the palm of his hand facing the floor. Then he turned his arm over and brought his fingers in and out of his hand. "Just bring it, bitch"

Nina just gave him a strange look and starts to shoot Jin. Jin takes cover.

"Son of a bitch," Jin shouts. So much for selling some pie, or strudel for that matter.

"Hmph, worm," Nina left the store.

Jin went to the back to where Hwoarang was.

"Get your bitch ass up," Jin shouts. Hwoarang jumps up.

"What?" Hwoarang asked.

"My shift's over," Jin said. "Get the fuck out there. I got porn to watch."

"Dammit, Kazama I hate you," Hwoarang shouts and exits to the front.

_Later that day…_

Anna Williams came into the shop, wearing skimpy clothes, to buy some kind of food for a little get-together she was having. She looked around and then came to the counter with two loafs of bread.

"Hello, Hwoarang," she said with disgust.

"Hello, slut," Hwoarang said flatly.

"Ugh," Anna said angrily, "You're almost as bad as Jin. You're so pathetic."

"Oh, right, and you're breasts aren't bigger than Jennifer Lopez's ass," Hwoarang retorted sarcastically, "Hwoarang couldn't care less what you say. You associate yourself with a pile of Grade A monkey crap!"

"You know, I hope Steve and Lee kick your ass at The King of Iron Fist 7," Anna glared at him, with her finger, not to mention, her chest, pointing at him, "No, I know they'll kick your ass because Steve is better than you and my Lee is unstoppable. And when they're done with you, you won't be able to get off of the floor. "

"Anna, Anna," Hwoarang chuckled, "You'll be the one who _won't_ get off the floor."

"Ugh," she said losing her patience, "I want to buy these loafs of bread."

"Bread. What do you need bread for? You've got two loafs of bread right there on you," Hwoarang said pointing to her chest," You could even take those…things and throw them in your "guests" faces like a whipped cream pie. Hey, let the boobies hit the faces, or better yet, let the boobies hit the floor. What with that rag you're wearing. Thanks for cleaning my floor, it's been very dirty."

"AAAHHH!" she shrieked and with a high voice said, "I'm telling Lee. He's going to get you for what you just said to me, Hwoarang."

"WHAAAH, WHAAAH," Hwoarang mocked, "Ah, know your role and shut your mouth, before I kick your roody poo candy ass. You sound like a damn whale. Your popcorn fart of a boyfriend isn't here and I wonder if he knows that you've slept with everyone in the entire world. I hear, you're even doing it with Kuma. That's just sick! What the fuck is wrong with you?"

"Ugh," she said disgusted again, "You'll pay for this!"

"Do you like icing?" Hwoarang asked unexpectedly

Anna looked confused. "Uh...yah."

"Well, then, ICE your way down to the Smackdown hotel, and the least you could do is get a room."

Anna screamed, threw her head back, and then stormed out.

_Even later that day…_

Someone else came into the bakery and looked around sickly at all the desserts and food.

"_What junk," he thought _

The person came to a stop at the counter where Hwoarang had his back to the person, making some kind of dessert. Finally Hwoarang turned around at the feeling of a presence and glared at the person.

Finally he spoke. "What in the BLUE HELL are you staring at?"

"I wasn't staring at nothin', bitch," said Eddy Gordo.

"Oh, that's not what I saw. Were you… just staring at mah buns, muthfucka?

"What you talkin' about, asshole?" Eddy said disgusted.

"You were just looking at mah buns." Hwoarang said.

"No, I wasn't, you dick. You must be blind" Eddy said getting angry.

"Oh, no, no, no, no. NO! Hwoarang has very good eyesight. I saw the way you looked at Hwoarang and his buns." He then stuck his butt in Eddy's face, then turned back around. "Eddy, hell, Edward, I'm appalled. You just looked at Hwoarang's buns again."

"No, I didn't, hoe. You stuck it in my face."

"You grabbed my buns and probably took a good whiff of it too. I see you looking at other men; I see how you look at other men. I know you like buns, hell, even strudel. There's nothing to be ashamed of."

"I don't know what you talkin' about, but I don't like men or buns, especially not yours." Eddy said angrily.

"I'll have you know, I have the best buns in Tekken. Ladies love 'em." Hwoarang said.

Hwoarang then held up his hand, faced it, and shook it. The he performed some of Eddy's attack moves.

Eddy was furious. "You NEVER take my moves or else you're just writing yourself a death wish. You better write one now, because at the next tournament, me and Lee are going to kill you."

"At KIF 7, when THE MOST ELECTRIFYING MARTIAL ARTIST in gaming today and in the kitchen, enters the fray with you two jabronis, I will layeth the smacketh down on both your candy asses. Now, get out of here before I stick a cupcake straight up your candy ass."

Hwoarang puts his hand on Eddy's shoulder. Eddy is confused.

Hwoarang grabs a spatula and looks up.

"IF YOU SMELLL…LALALALOW…WHAT HWOARANG DOO SAN…"

Hwoarang beats some eggs for a dramatic pause.

"IS COOKIN."

Eddy is too disgusted, so he gets outta there. Hwoarang left to the back to get Jin, but the door was locked.

"Don't come in," Jin shouted. He was clearly masturbating as Hwoarang knew.

"Kazama, stop beating your 1-incher and go to the front," Hwoarang said.

"Go fuck yourself," Jin shouted from behind the door. Hwoarang broke the door down.

"GET OUT," Hwoarang throws Jin out half naked.

"Dammit, what am I going to do with this boner?" Jin asks. Then, an idea popped in his head. He ran to the front to get a bagel and butter. He then goes into the bathroom. Grunting sounds can be heard.

_35 minutes later…_

Jin emerged from the bathroom. Hwoarang is standing at the door.

"What the fuck, dude?" Hwoarang asked mortified.

"It was so simple," Jin said. "Have sex with bagels. How did I not think of this sooner?"

"Why the fuck do I hang out with your ass?" Hwoarang proceeds to go in the bathroom, rolling a blunt with weed in it.

_Even later that day…_

Christie Montiero came into the bakery wanting some dessert just for the hell of it. It was no secret she had a sweet tooth. She went to the counter where Jin was admiring himself in a pot.

"Ahem," Christie cleared her throat.

Jin looked up. "Well, hello, sexy lady. What can I do you for?"

"I was just looking for a dessert. What's good here?" She said smiling at him while leaning over the counter, giving Jin a good view of her large chest.

"Do you…like strudel?" Jin asked with a smile on his face.

"Oh, yes," she said seductively.

"Do you…like The Kazama strudel?" Jin smiled bigger.

"Oh, very much," she said the same way.

Jin looked at her. She was smiling sexily. Then Jin took his spatula and looked up.

"FINALLY…JIN KAZAMA HAS MADE…. A SALE."

The two go at it right in the middle of the floor but not before Jin shuts the blinds and changes the open sign to closed. Hwoarang comes out to the front and sees what is going on.

"Kazama you son of a bitch," Hwoarang asked. "How in the hell…"

"Easy," Jin muffled in between kisses. "I'm not a 5'8'', Korean redhead."

"Fuck you," Hwoarang shouted. "I'm going to watch porn."

**End Chapter**

**It's about damn time I got this up. It's been too long. Sorry. Just R&R, yo!**

_Next time on The Misadventures of Jin Kazama…_

"_Boy, what the fuck are you wearing?" Kazuya asked._

"_BUFU," Jin said._

"_The fuck is that?" Kazuya asked._

"_Buy Us…Fuck You," Jin said._

"_Were you ever this stupid while you were floating around in my nuts?" Kazuya asked, agitated._


End file.
